Back-to-School Survival Guide for Parents and Students

Special Section: Back to School 2009

The anticipation of going back to school brings excitement and anxiety to both parents and children. The first day of school can be a scary prospect for anyone, as well as disappointment the summer is coming to an end. First day jitters, fear of new routines and separation anxiety affect many students every year. Separation anxiety can be overwhelming for many young children, but there are many ways to make the first day of school an easy transition for everyone.

• Request the class list ahead of time – Parents should ask the school for a copy of their child’s upcoming class list, and then try to arrange for play dates with some of the new classmates.

• Meet the teacher on the first day – Parents should meet with the teacher and child to discuss upcoming classroom activities and to discuss the child’s fears, dislikes, allergies or other issues the teacher should be made aware of.

• Spend time in the classroom – Parents should be flexible, arriving early and spending time in the classroom until the child feels comfortable and starts getting settled in. Checking out the classroom with the child will help them feel more at ease.

• Saying goodbye – For younger children, separating from parents can be difficult, but a good-bye ritual can lessen these anxieties. The best way is to give a quick kiss and hug and then cheerfully say “Good-bye, I’ll see you after school.” The key is to stay calm and positive.

• After-school activities – Plan something special for after school. Looking forward to a special after-school activity can help the child focus on getting through school so they can get on to the next activity.

• Keep schedules manageable – Getting off on the right foot means managing time effectively and establishing good study habits. Many stressed out people suffer from an overbooked schedule or a greater number of responsibilities than one can reasonably handle.

Practice good study habits from the outset. Maintain a calendar of homework, assignment and test descriptions and dates. Break big tasks, such as writing a term papers, into smaller, more manageable targets, like locate library and Internet resources; read and take notes, plan essay outline, write, proof-read, and edit. Review materials regularly and consult a tutor or teacher immediately when something is not understood.

Another step to establishing good study habits is to understand learning styles. Is learning done best by seeing, hearing or doing? Try some self-assessment questionnaires which can be found online and through the school’s guidance counselor. Once equipped with an understanding of which style works best, brainstorm how to make the most of it. For example, an audio learner should choose a seat where the lesson can be heard clearly.

• Develop a Support Network – Sometimes it helps just to know there is someone out there who is experiencing the same thing. Parents and students alike need such a system, even if it is just the other parents at the bus stop or an older sibling.

• Say No to Responsibility Overload – Many parents and students are anxious to get the year started and may want to dive headfirst into extracurricular activities. Or they may be asked by others to participate in these events. Many stressed out people are not poor stress managers – they are simply overloaded with commitments and responsibilities. Before agreeing to take on another task and risk stress from an overbooked schedule or not being able to fulfill commitments, learn the signs of responsibility overload. As with all changes and improvements, learning to be free from overloaded and unwanted responsibilities is a skill that can be improved with time, leading ultimately to a more balanced life and better stress management. •